Amazing.. Nightmares.. Dreams.. Such wonderful things.
Today, I woke up at around 4 am and couldn't manage to sleep again until for an hour or so. Within this time it had made me think a lot.
Now why did I even wake up at 4 am in the morning?
I don't know.. I felt so happy yet so sad at the same time..
It was a nightmare or dream.
Within that nightmare, I was able to let go of all the anger that I had kept in me. It felt good.. But I had paid a massive price for that. This massive price had led me to being depressed. Of course, in the end, somehow I managed to smile and laugh, thanks to my friends.
That's right.. You could say that 'friends' is the main topic of this blog.
In my opponion, the best friends you could ever get are the ones in high school - where you will share most of your experiences in camps, classes, lunches, etc.
The best friend you could ever get is the one that you can look for when you are in trouble. One that understands you. My friends don't really understand me, but they cheer me up even at the worse occasions. Maybe that's probably who I am.
Back to the dream.
So I had let out all my anger, and someone was badly injured. Then I had lost something very important to me. But when I was walking in the fields, I saw my friend Richard and Frank, and they woke me up from that nightmare..
I don't know but, this could be a sign for me :).
All I can say is, a good friend is one that you can rely on when you are in trouble. It's just that you shouldn't stab them in the back for any reason.
Moving onto the next topic of this blog, mainly my feelings..
Recently, I have been unable to sleep properly.. Why? I do believe that I am suffering from depression.
I have had fatigue and tiredness on very random occasions, and even, headaches. Even right now as I am typing this, I begin to feel dizzy.
I'm beginning to feel worried about myself. I can't sleep, I can't eat very well.
If you haven't noticed, I do not eat much except an apple at school.
I skip breakfast in the morning, and the only thing I usually have is dinner. Sounds fun aye? Strangely, I don't feel hungry at all..
All I ever do is sit there, and think about the worst that could happen.
Maybe I just worry tooooooooo much.
I have the fear of hurting others, and the fear of losing the ones I love.
Tuesday, December 8, 2009
Wednesday, December 2, 2009
The Education in Vietnam
I can only start off by saying how different the educational system is compared to what is here in Australia. You could say that in Vietnam, they know alot but don't know alot. Get what I'm saying?
Well, they study alot and know alot which makes them smart, yet the variety of technology and the availability to new information is just so poor. Because of this, most of the people in Vietnam do not know much.
As a matter of fact, I could only say that their level of Science has grown really slowly.
One day, I asked my parents if they knew that someone could survive without meat. Well, obviously they couldn't because they need the vitamins that could only be found in meat. Well, they answered no, but a no with a 'you must eat meat'. Sadly this is incorrect. Of course there are some foods such as Tofu that give the consumer the same vitamins. We sort of argued over this but of course, I was right.
So as you can see in the above paragraph, the Science taught in Vietnam is very poor. Even as I've heard many stories of my dad being very smart, etc. He did not know that tofu could be a meat substitute.
After having that arguement with my parents, it had made me think about the education in Vietnam.
When I was in year four, I had travelled back to Vietnam for a what-supposed-to-be 2 week vacation (until I realised I had so much fun that I forced my mum extend it to 6 week). Within this time, I was once told to read and do some maths questions. It was in Vietnamese so that didn't help, but I noticed that they taught year 7 maths to year 4s. Amazing huh? How do I know? It was asking for the area of a trapezium or so, and we haven't learned that until last year or so.
Not only that, but I could still remember the time when pumps were still used, even back when I was in year 4. It was amazing. The water was free and still is, but dirty.
Now with the improvement of technology, the life in Vietnam is slowly becoming better, but I'm still concerened about Vietnam's knowledge of Science. I'm sure that they haven't discovered the many bacteria. They don't even know about the many form of cancers that can appear, which leads me to another sad story which makes me look back and really make me close my eyes.
If you hadn't known, my grandpa on my father's side had died when I was 4. The people in Vietnam likes to smoke tobacco, and my grandpa just happened to be one of them. By his 60s, I guess he had throat cancer, and that's how he died. I was clueless, so I have decided to ask some of the old ladies that lived in our street.
My grandma told me that he died of something that she didn't know, and this old lady said that he died because he had this lump on the back of his neck.
Not long after, I could only realize that he died of throat cancer, with the evidence that I have picked up..
Now, I stare at my uncle, thinking that he could not help it but smoke once every 30 minutes..
I could still remember the time I was in this really old building for pre school. My mum walked past for the rice paddies.
I cried..
It shows how quickly life goes by..
And when I go back to Vietnam, I could still remember that building..
Only, it is now dilapidated.. unoccupied.
Well, they study alot and know alot which makes them smart, yet the variety of technology and the availability to new information is just so poor. Because of this, most of the people in Vietnam do not know much.
As a matter of fact, I could only say that their level of Science has grown really slowly.
One day, I asked my parents if they knew that someone could survive without meat. Well, obviously they couldn't because they need the vitamins that could only be found in meat. Well, they answered no, but a no with a 'you must eat meat'. Sadly this is incorrect. Of course there are some foods such as Tofu that give the consumer the same vitamins. We sort of argued over this but of course, I was right.
So as you can see in the above paragraph, the Science taught in Vietnam is very poor. Even as I've heard many stories of my dad being very smart, etc. He did not know that tofu could be a meat substitute.
After having that arguement with my parents, it had made me think about the education in Vietnam.
When I was in year four, I had travelled back to Vietnam for a what-supposed-to-be 2 week vacation (until I realised I had so much fun that I forced my mum extend it to 6 week). Within this time, I was once told to read and do some maths questions. It was in Vietnamese so that didn't help, but I noticed that they taught year 7 maths to year 4s. Amazing huh? How do I know? It was asking for the area of a trapezium or so, and we haven't learned that until last year or so.
Not only that, but I could still remember the time when pumps were still used, even back when I was in year 4. It was amazing. The water was free and still is, but dirty.
Now with the improvement of technology, the life in Vietnam is slowly becoming better, but I'm still concerened about Vietnam's knowledge of Science. I'm sure that they haven't discovered the many bacteria. They don't even know about the many form of cancers that can appear, which leads me to another sad story which makes me look back and really make me close my eyes.
If you hadn't known, my grandpa on my father's side had died when I was 4. The people in Vietnam likes to smoke tobacco, and my grandpa just happened to be one of them. By his 60s, I guess he had throat cancer, and that's how he died. I was clueless, so I have decided to ask some of the old ladies that lived in our street.
My grandma told me that he died of something that she didn't know, and this old lady said that he died because he had this lump on the back of his neck.
Not long after, I could only realize that he died of throat cancer, with the evidence that I have picked up..
Now, I stare at my uncle, thinking that he could not help it but smoke once every 30 minutes..
I could still remember the time I was in this really old building for pre school. My mum walked past for the rice paddies.
I cried..
It shows how quickly life goes by..
And when I go back to Vietnam, I could still remember that building..
Only, it is now dilapidated.. unoccupied.
Tuesday, December 1, 2009
Sonnet CXVI
Let me not to the marriage of true minds
Admit impediments. Love is not love
Which alters when it alteration finds,
Or bends with the remover to remove:
O, no! It is an ever fixed mark,
That looks on tempests and is never shaken;
Whose worth's unknown, athough his height be taken.
Love's not Time's fool, though rosy lips and cheeks
Within his bending sickle's compass come;
Love alters not with his brief hours and weeks,
But bears it out even to the edge of doom.
If this be error and upon me proved,
I never writ, nor no man ever loved.
William Shakespeare
Admit impediments. Love is not love
Which alters when it alteration finds,
Or bends with the remover to remove:
O, no! It is an ever fixed mark,
That looks on tempests and is never shaken;
Whose worth's unknown, athough his height be taken.
Love's not Time's fool, though rosy lips and cheeks
Within his bending sickle's compass come;
Love alters not with his brief hours and weeks,
But bears it out even to the edge of doom.
If this be error and upon me proved,
I never writ, nor no man ever loved.
William Shakespeare
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