Here we go again

Parents pushing me to get a girlfriend, get a job blah blah blah. Life just feels really rushed and I don't seem to have the time to slow it down even a little bit to enjoy/explore it.

It's not like I haven't had girlfriend(s) before. They just don't know it and they keep acting like I don't know shit. But the truth is. I do know. And it hurts.Every damn time I'm reminded of it.

There's always this moment of spark that tells me to talk to that girl. But then I think it's futile. What really is the point of it all?

I've been there, done that but I know it doesn't suck.

Every time I think of relationships I'm reminded: What's good about me?

Cos you know. I've been questioned exactly that. What's good about me?
I've asked a girl. What's good about me? They said I don't know. Maybe sometimes you like someone just because. Who knows.

I've been told by a girl. I can list many things about you that I don't like about you, but I don't know why I still like you.

And those words hurt in a way. In a profound way. A way that makes me question everyday. What makes a good person? What makes them likeable? What makes them attractive? What separates you from me.

I honestly don't know. Just gunna leave Michael's new song before the end of this post. From what google translate tells me, it's meant to be a positive outlook on life and loneliness. Taking those moments of self time to enjoy those brief moments in life each day. But it just sounds so sad...