Haven't done one of these in a while. Not sure if it's the drinking that makes me think. Or maybe I just don't have anything better to do when I'm going out. It's probably why I hate going out, it's surprisingly when I think the most). Sitting on the comp.. well time just flies and you just get stuck in what you're doing and you tend to forget.
Anyways, this blog is some sort of cliched reflection sort of thing. Meh I guess. Let's go on with the post anyways.
Shit.. I always forget what I was going to write about just as I sit here.
So my life.. I've been really concerned about the future.. except I don't really seem to do much about it. It amazes me how well people get along with their life while I'm just.. sitting here being unproductive. Yeah.. people get to places.
So let's begin with what my life's sorta about.
Parents want me to acquire knowledge and using the knowledge become successful in life. Then games came into my life. I wouldn't say I'm bad with either and I probably could excel in one if I just focused, but I don't. I'm not naturally smart, definitely not. And I do know naturally smart when I see it and I'm definitely not that. I'm just one of those that learn quickly (usually) and apply. Not a critical thinker though and I wish I was. Smart people are critical thinkers (so I've been told at least, and I don't disagree to be honest).
I mean, I have screwed up non-school related exams so that probably says something. Or maybe it says something about the way I think? Who knows. Things are complicated and me thinking about them doesn't seem to make it any better.
So what I really wanted to say was, I've always wanted to try gaming as a professional. Or maybe something gaming related. I love games. They say you should follow your passion. I enjoy games and interacting with others in these communities. So what if I had followed some gaming-related path instead of science? Who knows. I've just been told that I should be growing out of games and that they get me nowhere, but hey, there are jobs, and heaps of them.
Dad says gamers don't make money for a living but E-sports (electronic sports) is becoming a thing, and professional gamers are slowly being recognised as professional, legitimate"athletes". They don't earn as much but they're still enjoying what they're doing right? And it's also funny because one of the games I play have been aired on Vietnamese TV and Dad actually sees it, but I don't think his perception's changed one bit. He's tunnel-visioned on the academic side of earning a living.
So why'd I start thinking about this?
Well... I follow a couple of YouTubers that play the same games I do and it just so happens that there was this guy. His channel gained success from playing video games and he gained lots of views and subscribers. After two years or so (I think) he just lost passion for it and he started branching out to other games. He stopped making videos for the game he originally played and he started getting less viewers and people started unsubscribing. Where's he now?
After about 5 months, he posted a video with an update. He stopped gaming completely and actually got back to one of his older passions which is programming. He's been dedicating heaps of time to it. Waking up early, going to day job (not full time I'm assuming) and learning so he could get a proper job. He moved onto the next 'phase' of life, away from gamin. And a big part of me wishes that this phase just "comes" to me. I don't think that's possible.People say that you'll mature and grow out of things. Maybe I took it too literally or maybe not.
People sure do get to places huh.
It kinda saddens me though. Youtuber moves along with life and I'm still sitting here seeming as though I'm stuck in the past. And that's just classic me, being stuck in the past. I watch his videos, stop because he stopped making the videos I like and now he's programming. I'm still gonna check up on his channel though because he's seemed to have made a connection with me (despite being somewhat relatively non-existent).
Which draws on another point. Check on your friends every now and then. Say 'hi' even. You never know what's happened to them during all the time that has passed. Maybe one day, you might not be able to because something bad happened and you might end up regretting.
Which reminds me of something that happened a couple of days ago. Some context first. I came to Australia and restarted primary school. In year 1, my english still sucked by I distinctly remember a time I was put in detention (I think) for absolutely no reason. I was a lonely kid with no friends and there were a bunch of other students from my class poking at me. I couldn't reply and the next thing I know, I was in trouble with a teacher. She got one of the year 6's (I believe) to talk to me in Vietnamese and it got nowhere from what I recall. The same dude still lives a few streets away from me. I saw him when he transitioned into high school. I saw him grow very quickly but remain the skinny himself. No I'm not a stalker, I just remember him for some weird reason. And last week coming home from Uni, I saw him again, at least I think it was. The facial features and him being skinny it was the exact same thing. I really wanted to say hi to him.. and part of saying hi is not being afraid or nervous.
I need to develop that :).
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