Quick Post

Jealousy is a horrible feeling, avoid that horrible horrible feeling.
Try not to make others jealous.
Jealousy can lead to heaps of complications... doubt perhaps?
It really is a horrible feeling.

How does one avoid it? I don't know.
There needs to be understanding but such thing is so hard to achieve.


It really is hard for me to elaborate at the moment. When I have time I'll collaborate all this into one post...

On another note, here's a scenario where there are two ways of looking at it. What is right and what is wrong in our perspective and in the Buddhist perspective?

There is a girl that you like but she is dating a guy. You want to talk to her but you are afraid that you and her will become close and then she would eventually fall for you and break up with the other guy.
You talking to her could also probably make the guy jealous and begin to doubt her.
Of course, this is wrong of the guy so the right thing would be show her how much he loves her right? But what if no matter what he does, she just doesn't feel it any more with him, perhaps because of you?
So is it right of you to be talking to her since you like her?
I think the human emotion would allow for it, not really giving a shit about what would happen to the other guy. A lot of people simply put it as that "You like her, she likes you and that's that".

We have negative emotions rising from this situation, and it can lead to doubt..
And doubt is horrible.. Jealousy is horrible..
I would hate to make other people begin to doubt. I would hate to make them feel jealous. They're horrible emotions. I don't want others to feel these emotions because I've been there and it feels like shit. I don't want any one to ever experience it.
What would you do?


What is this thing we call 'love'? I don't understand any more and I don't want to step outside to reach for it any more. It's so complicated.

Perhaps, I'm just overthinking it.
Am I?

Reading this, I sort of sound like some person trying to convert others into Buddhism and I'm not.. I'm just here to provide my understanding of the world now.. and it sounds really Buddhist-y. But um.. I will elaborate on this some other time, just not now.

Some feelings..

I'm feeling a bit.. down.. lately.. but I think I'm managing. Will expand on this soon(hopefully).

Meanwhile listen to this song

Listen to this song while I get everything sorted out.. lots going on at the moment. Might explain it later.

Turn up your volume :).

"Mata Ashita" - Every Little Thing, lyrics from Jpopasia.com

nani wo suru wake ja nakutemo
konna ni itoshii jikan ga hora
ima koko ni nagarete iru yo
itazura ni warau
shigusa mo, kuchiguse mo zenbu
kimi rashii to omou hodo, suki ni natta

hazukashikute madamada iesou ni wa nai
kedo...
kimi ga omou yori mo kitto, kimi wo
daiji ni omou kara

* "mata ashita" de owaru kyou
zutto issho ni, iretara ii ne.
yuugure ga utsushidashita
futatsu naranda kage wo mitsumenagara
sonna koto wo, omotta n da...

"anmari tokui ja nakute" to
uzumukinagara mo kimi wa kureta
boku ni dake ai no kokochi

honto no honto wa, kitto
kimi dake shika shiranai
soredemo boku wa kimi no subete wo
zutto shinjiteru kara

mou jiki ne meguriaete
futatsu me ni naru fuyu ga kuru kara
samugari na kimi ni boku ga
shite agerareru koto ga aru to ii naa~

korogatte yuku kisetsu no naka ni
ima bokura ga mitsuketa mono wa...

heibon na "atarimae" wo
zutto daiji ni dekitara ii ne
kimi ga ite boku ga ireru
aimokawarazu kyou mo ai shiteru

Happy Valentine's Day

**** WILL UPDATE SOON. LOTS HAPPENING ATM AND I REALLY CAN'T BE BOTHERED TO UPDATE****

Yay, I arrive in Australia on Valentine's day.
Can post again, have lots. Will post later tonight. Got to unpack etc.
Guess I'll start with talking about love and the new blogger title crap w/e thingymajig.

A post before departure

Where to begin... where, where, where...
Been moving around heaps with lots on my mind.
Uhh.. to begin.. I guess I could talk about the title of this post.

I'm going to be traveling to Vietnam on the 20th (Monday) to visit relatives for three weeks. I'm really excited, especially with Tet coming up. Whenever I think about it, I'm reminded of my childhood memories. Perhaps, I could take photos and then post them up here and talk about what I remember.

Next topic!!! I've been listening to heaps of "Every little thing" the Japanese Band whose "Grip!" was an opening for Inuyasha. And here's a recommended playlist for anyone who's interested :), and that's another topic.

Now onto some more serious stuff which revolves some of my beliefs and ideals that I uphold mainly derived from Buddhism...

I've been looking up Vietnamese folklore and stories lately and I think this one is pretty interesting:

http://www.culture-4-travel.com/friendship-story.html

To sum it up, it's about three poor friends who attend the same school. They told each other that if any one of them would ever become successful, they would help the others out. The three friends separate and attend different uhh colleges?
We'll call them Friend A, B and C.
Friend A and B become famous but B is very greedy.
Friend C has no success and remains poor.
Remembering their words, friend A leaves his home and presents himself as a poor person and travels long distances to meet his old friends. B is greedy and treats A very unkindly. C is poor and is very generous to A so in the end A helps out C. B finds out about A's wealth and gives A a visit however A treats him the way B had treated him before. B regrets his action..

Now, this story does raise some rather.. odd questions for me. What does it say about the poor and the rich? If C was rich would he still be as generous?
We may see A as someone we can look up to. But.. it raises another question for me. A treats B in the same manner B had treated him. Is this right of a person? It does raise questions about my beliefs in accordance with Buddhism. In a way, I still think what A did was sort of wrong, but understanding in a more common human mind? I hope that's correct wording for it. If someone treats you wrong, do you treat them in the same way? Or should you be kind to all no matter what? Was that not what the Buddha was like?

Moving on again..

I have huge trust problems. I find it very hard to completely trust a person and trust is easily lost with me. I'm quite wary of a lot of things, very unnecessarily too. I think it's come from the way I've been raised.
I remember a lot times when my parents and friends lied to me as a kid. With my parents lying, I sort of understand that it's for my own benefit... but the extent to which they lied sort of made me very wary of everything till this day. I'm overtly cautious and I reckon it's a huge setback for me.
Lately, with me going to Vietnam, my mum's been telling me a lot about the people in Vietnam and how I should be extremely careful.
I think.. Vietnam needs help.. and I want to help in the future.
My mum tells me a lot about the people of Vietnam. She warns me of druggies, thieves etc over and over again and it makes me feel uneasy. She mentions how people can frame you for being the drug dealer like for example, a person asking you to hold a bag for them.
That's sort of reasonable of her to say... but then she mentions the word "help". She tells me that even if an old lady asks me for help, I should not do it.
I'm in moral conflict....

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Change

aishitai yo itsumo
kakegae no nai mono
egao no afureru mirai e

kimi no iru machi made
densha ni tobinotte
ima sugu ai ni uki tai na

bokura wa tabi o shiteru
shiawase o mitsuke taku te
kokoro ni aoi sora ga tsuzuku kagiri

furisosoi da hikari kanji nagara
mie nai koto me o toji te shimawa nu you ni
souzou shi te saki o mi ni iyuko
kimi to nara doko made mo arui te ikeru kara

tsurai koto atte mo
ganbatte iru kimi wa
mata hitotsu yume ni chikazui ta

aoi sora o miage te
me ippai ni shimi ta namida
wasure zu ni i rare tara tsuyoku nareru

megutte yuku toki o kanji nagara
hitori ja nai kara kawatte ikeru hazu sa
kakae kire nu omoi dakishime te
onaji you de chigau hibi taisetsu ni iki tai

bokura wa tabi o shiteru
shiawase o mitsuke taku te
kokoro ni aoi sora ga tsuduku kagiri

furisosoi da hikari kanji nagara
mie nai koto me o toji te shimawa nu you ni
souzou shi te saki o mi ni iyuko
kimi to nara doko made mo arui te ikeru

I love "Every little thing" now!!!

Nice lil picture